Sunday, September 14, 2014

observation

Parties are ok, but they're really not.

I am so self-conscious at parties that I drink more than I should, not to get drunk per se but to be able to speak, listen, joke, laugh, whatever. At parties I drink a lot to lose any sense of myself and then I get exactly what I bargained for - no sense of myself. Not so with small groups, just with parties. Then I am ruined for the next day - I have to stop what I'm doing, cancel what I've planned, and recover physically and mentally with rest and quiet. 

As an experiment, the next time I go to a party I will drink only very little (if at all), and if I can't get or remain comfortable, I'll leave.

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